Thursday, October 28, 2010


What to do? What ever to do?

Whilst the operators of vehicles with manual transmission are transformed by exercise into doppelgangers for Greek gods, automatic owners let their left legs fall into the sin of sloth.

Their shrimpy left legs fall into disuse. White, shriveled up, weak left legs across the country lay dormant at the sides of their perseverant co-workers. Automatic owners listless driving here and there, all the while achieving no exercise or calorie burn with half of their lower limbs. What's to become of the ignored appendages? Forgetting muscle movements, losing muscle tone, shriveling up due to poor circulation.

Soon they'll all claim workers comp, quit their jobs, run up lots of credit card debt on ridiculous looking shoes, socks, legwarmers and the like, and then take the better portion of their body's paycheck in the form of welfare.

I detest this hypothesis, and protest the hate crimes being performed every second around the country by all the foolish wretches that are selfish enough to own clutchless cars.

Stop the mindless violence. Work for a better tomorrow. This is change we can believe in.

It's now or never:


1 comment:

  1. As a forward moving Shifter myself, I must say that I completely agree. When faced with the wrrtched sin of automatic peril my left appendage fells worthless, left out and slightly suicidal. Shifters of the world must unite to bring instant attention to this fatal cause. Which means of course, my dearest J.A.M., that you must now actually drive a manual. Great thoughts though for a "shrimpy left leg" peering in from the outside. :D